My sister: See you at home in about an hour.
Me: Okay.
My sister: Sister, where are you? *She looks out the window.*
Me: Sis, I'm here, can't you see me?
Sister: OMG, she's dead!
Me: Yeah, I know, but can't you see me?
Okay, okay, so one day I was on the way home, and this kid said, "Man, I could kick your butt." Five seconds later, I kicked his butt.
I was bullying an orphan, then I said, "What, you gonna run home and cry to your mom?"
When an orphan is playing baseball, how come the coach doesn't tell them to hit it home?
He has no home to hit to.
What do you call an orphan? Homeless.
What's an orphan's worst favorite movie? Home Alone.
Why can't homeless people find a home? Because they're orphans.
Why did the orphan jump into the burning building?
It was too cold because they did not have a home.
Anybody home? :)
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Why can’t orphans go on “go big or go home?”
Cuz they’d always have to go big as they have no home.
How are Eggs Benedict and a blow job alike?
You can't get either one at home.
I walked up to a cat and started to sing a song. The cat said, "HECK NO!" then ran off. I follow it while still singing "BABY COME HOME TO ME!!"
Teacher: Ok kids, time to go home.
The orphan: What is home?
Teacher: Here, I have somewhere for you.
*puts in trash can*
What do you call an orphan with a gun?
(No) home shooter.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
Why can’t orphans build anything?
Because they can’t go to Home Depot.
My boss told me to have a good day, so I went home.
My teacher told me to have a good day. SOOOOOOOOOO I went home :)
Why don't orphans do homework?
They don't have a home to do it in.
How many fat people are in my house?
20, counting the kids in the basement.
"I love you, you too. I-eeeeeee was the night. Time is it when you you get a typical sleep night. Is oooooooo, is it a walk home was the night night and a tree is it?"
You can't give an orphan homework.
