Hit jokes

When Chris Brown heard he wasn’t the only one to hit a woman.

Stop the cap.

What did the tower say to the other one?

I will see you later; I am about to get hit.

One day, I was just chillin', being a tower. I saw a plane, but it was slowly growing.

Then it hit me.

Wanna know the last words of the south tower?

"HAHA LOOK AT YOU! IMAGINE BEING HIT YOU L BOZO!"

Weed: *gets hit by his own power*

Cop: Wait, shouldn’t you be resistant to your own element?

Weed: Are you resistant to bullets when you shoot a gun?

John Kreese's forehead broke when silver hit 'em in the forehead.

"Bob it, twist it, pull it, hit it, turn it, twist it, slide it."

Nostalgia hits you like a train.

It's so hard, you can even wake up.

Yo mama so fat, when she jumps, NASA says a meteor hits Earth.

Life is never hard until you get hit hard with reality.

What did Pavol Demitra think before the Yaroslavl plane hit the ground?

"Oh shit, did I leave the stove on at home?"

What did Josef Vasicek think before the plane hit the ground?

"Oh shit, is my name still on the Stanley Cup?"

So NFL teams were playing football on me, and then Justin Jefferson hit something called "the gritty" on me.

Why did the little boy get hit by a car?

Answer: Because Sally was driving!

An emo and a leaf fall from a tree, which hits the ground first?

The leaf, because the emo got caught by the rope.

What do you get when you cross an adopted kid with a river?

Moses hits the adoption lottery!

Do you know how I lost my music teacher job?

I tried to hit G by putting D.

I can't remember the last full conversation I had with my grandfather.

Good thing is, since he hit his head, he can't remember either.

Why did James fall off the swing?

He had no arms.

Why did the dog cross the road?

It didn't. Got hit by a car on the way to the other side.