History

History jokes

George Washington

Q: If George Washington was alive today, what would he do?

A: Scratch mercilessly at the coffin walls, while screaming at the top of his lungs!

  • 0
  • Book

    What is Hitler's favorite book? "Hitler and the chamber of secrets."

    Memes

    Man

    A Person that puts a RickRoll in a book is actually the hero we all needed...

    A page of text detailing the life and work of Niels Bohr, a prominent figure in physics.

    Time

    I’m old enough to remember innocent times when the worst headline was plane hijackers flying into buildings.

    Gender

    The Twin Towers and genders have a lot in common. There used to be two, and now it's just a touchy subject.

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  • Zero

    You meet the guy who invented 0, what do you tell him? Thanks for nothing!

    Difference

    What's the difference between Princess Diana and Thomas the Tank Engine?

    Thomas came out the other end of the tunnel.

    Lie

    A family of three, a dad, a mom, and a 12 year old son are driving in the car when the dad says, “How about we play a little game of two truths and a lie? It’ll be fun.”

    “Ok,” the mom and son reply happily.

    “Let me start,” says the son.

    “Ok, go ahead,” replies the mom.

    “I hate video games, I hate school, and I love junk food,” says the son.

    “Ooh ooh! You do love junk food, you do hate school, and you don’t hate video games.” Says the mom.

    “You’re right!” He replies.

    “I’ll go next,” says the dad. “I love your mom, you’re adopted, and my dad almost died in WWII.”

    “Hmm... Your dad did not almost die in WWII, obviously I’m not adopted, and you do love my mom.” Says the son.

    “The lie isn’t that you’re adopted,” says the dad.

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  • Firework

    I popped some fireworks and told my Vietnamese grandfather that World War 3 started.

    Debt

    Man 1: Why don’t we just put all the debt in the world on one man, then kill him?

    Man 2: We tried that once. It started a cult.

    President

    We all know that Lincoln and Kennedy are the most open-minded presidents in the world.

    Racism

    What do Nike and the KKK have in common?

    They both make Black people run faster.