History jokes
Why can't Americans trade with other countries? We lost the trading center!
The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
Why did the Indian cross the road?
To run away from the Pakistani.
What did Hitler tell the eye doctor?
“I can na-zi.”
What do you need in order to crash a train?
A bad track record.
Why can’t dinosaurs cross the road?
Because they’re dead.
Why did Hitler get hit by a baseball?
Because he did nazi it coming!
9/11.
"9/11 was just a really intense game of Jenga."
Who was the knight on the Round Table that only ate meat?
Sir Loin.
How did the USA beat Japan in rapping?
By dropping two of the biggest roasts.
Why did Hitler say "nein"? Because he just got raped, bitch!
Why didn't Hitler's girlfriend like giving him a blowjob? It left a Nazi taste in her mouth...
Where was Moses when the lights went out? - In the dark!
What was Stephen Hawking's name before he got his disease?
Stephen Walkins.
Friend: How dark is your humor?
Me: It picks cotton.
How do we know the Ancient Egyptians were into organized crime?
They were always using pyramid schemes!
Yeah, I keep telling everyone 9/11 jokes, but they all just crash and burn.
Who's Hitler's best friend? Nazis me.
What do you call an animal underground? A fossil.