History jokes
Why is America so bad at chess?
Because they already lost two towers.
Americans don't like playing chess with Muslims; last time they did play, they ended up losing two towers.
Person: So you know that person's name you say when you make a hoop, well he's dead.
Friend: Yeah, John Wilkes Booth.
Person: How dare you say that he killed Abraham Lincoln?
Friend: Terrible guy but he never missed a shot!
What do you call a dinosaur with a cowboy hat and cowboy boots?
A Tyrannosaurus Tex.
You know how they said weight people can't jump? Check out the 9/11 videos.
Ever heard the saying white people can’t jump??
Well, I think that’s total bullshit. You should have seen us on 9/11!
My grandpa was in 9/11. He was the best pilot.
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
Because they ordered pepperoni pizza and they got plain!
Why can’t Helen Keller have kids?
Answer: She’s dead.
Article 1: the Titanic is practically unsinkable.
Article 4: the Titanic sank.
Did you know Yao Ming has the biggest penis in Chinese history? It measured in at nearly 5 inches!
I would tell you a joke about 9/11, but it would come crashing down on you.
Hit 'em with the 1, 2, Jeffery Dahmer!
What is the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl?
You need to drop the bomb twice on her before she gets it.
Hit'em with the Ted Bundy.
"Sir, we're mining too many useless mineral ores."
Hitler: "Mine less, then."
Grammar Nazi bursts in: "MINE FEWER!"
Hitler looks over: "Yes?"
No one.
Absolutely no one.
The History Channel at 11:00 PM: Who really killed JFK?
Someone at my school the other day said that whoever killed Hitler was a hero. Who's going to tell him?
In the morning at 6:30 AM,
Teacher: Who fought in World War I?
Me: Trump & Biden.
Teacher: Oh ok... well good job class, see you tomorrow and study your books.
After school,
Teacher: Oh God those kids know nothing.
"She looks at her clock."
Teacher: And now I am sewed.
I heard World War 500000 in my parents'.