History jokes

I've been sad recently that the Twin Towers aren't around, so I made the conclusion to build a time machine to watch it again.

What was Hitler's favorite part of the car? The gas tank.

Why did the French call Napoleon "Napo?" Because it is Napo[leon].

Thomas Jefferson’s 80th b-day bash be like:

Jackson: "CALHOUN! YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME - IN BED WITH THE CONSTITUTION??"

When they said Titanic was "unsinkable," then they said, "The World Trade Centers was uncollapsible."

People on the Titanic were cracking up at my jokes, so did the Titanic. No, really, the Titanic cracked in half!

It's been an hour since I crashed the tower.

Little Johnny walked into an ice cream shop and asked: "Do you have chocolate filled ice cream?"

The man replies: "We are out of that, sorry, we are almost out of every single flavor, do you want me to get you a vanilla filled one?"

Johnny replies: "Sure."

After that, the man asks for Johnny's phone and goes to back of the store. 5 minutes later, the man comes with an ice cream and Johnny's phone.

Johnny asks: "How much for the ice cream?"

The man replies: "Nothing, it's on the house."

After Johnny ate his delicious ice cream, he searched for his watch history. And then Johnny realized the flavor of the ice cream.

Why are the Americans bad at chess?

Because they lost 2 towers.

Yo mama so old, she got nostalgia for the Big Bang!

Yo mama so old, she witnessed Noah building the ark.

Why can't a dodo fly? Cus it suicided when it saw you will be born soon.

I rate my dad as a pilot 9 out of 11.

I asked my dad, "Are we there yet?" and he told me, "Don't worry, son, it will be a short ride!"

Bro, I love hanging out with bullies. It's either we play Yahtzee or we playing Nazi.

One thing is for sure, the victims from 9/11 died warm.

You know the Twin Towers employees were supposed to meet a good football team. Instead, they just met the Jets.

Who is buried in the tomb of Alexander the Grape?

Alexander the raisin.

Why did Hitler kill himself? Cause gas prices were too high!

What type of car did Hitler drive? A gas-guzzler.