Her jokes
Why did the little girl flush herself down the toilet?
Because she wanted to join the Brownies.
So I came across a guy who was carrying a ton of clothing and makeup.
And I asked him what he is doing.
Guy: Some kawaii girl told me if I bought and brought her this crap, she would let me play with her tits.
Me: Erm... Are you a simp?
Two minutes later, the guy arrived at Kawaii Girl's house.
KG: You have it?
Guy: Yup, now can I play with them?
KG: Sure!
KG then went to her room.
Guy: Ohhhh, I know what your going to do. You're gonna call me over and you will be-
KG then held a bird cage with two birds in it.
KG: Have fun playing with them!
Guy: WHAT THE FU-
If you have a daughter, give her the same name as the mum; that way when you call for a beer, you get two beers, and when you call for sex, you get two sex...
Yo momma's so gay, you sucked her balls.
Whenever my artist girlfriend is sad, I let her draw things on my body.
I gave her a shoulder to crayon.
Who was the meanest man in the world?
He raped Helen Keller and threw her down a well, but not before cutting off her fingers so she couldn't yell for help.
My girlfriend is incredibly sad since her cat has disappeared.
I am quite sure now that I misunderstood something when she asked me to eat her pussy--and I am beginning to think that I did not get the "fuck her doggy" part either.
Yo mama is so stupid, she took her dog to the vet because she thought he had a tube of lipstick stuck between his legs.
Joe mama's so fat, I took a picture of her last year, and it’s still printing!
Yo mama is so stupid, she sold her car for gas money.
Yo mama is so ugly, if she got a pound for every boy that found her unattractive, boys would find her attractive.
She said she was hungry. So I fucked her in the ass and gave her a chili dog.
What did Queen Lettuce say to her greens?
Lettuce eat Brussels!
If I had a sister with only 1 leg... wouldn't her name be I-Lean?
What do you call a white girl that can run faster than her brothers? A redneck virgin.
What's the hardest part about sex with a Thai girl?
Her, probably.
Why didn’t Anne Frank just finish her diary?
Concentration problems.
Why did the out of shape cow quit her job?
She got tired of jumping over the moon.
Jack and Jill ran up the hill to pop some pills,
And Jill said, "Jack can do her without here will," and Jack's penis was still.
My friend has a dog who looks like cocoa. Her name is Cocoa!