Her jokes
Yo momma so fat that she could fit the entire map of the world on her body.
My sister bet me $100 that it was impossible for me to build a working car out of spaghetti.
You should have seen her face as I drove pasta!
Yo mama is so ugly that her portraits hang themselves.
Yo mama so fat, when they buried her, they named her Everest. Mount Everest.
Yo mama so stupid, she put a battery up her a** and said, "I GOT THE POWER!"
Helen Keller: *Gets knocked to the floor*
Helen Keller (in her head): "Wow, I didn't see that coming!"
Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing!
Yo mama so fat when someone asked her to touch her chin, she asked, "Which one?"
What has 2 arms but no legs?
A crippled woman with no more meaning in her life.
How do you make your girlfriend scream during sex?
Call and tell her about it.
My cousin just broke up with his girlfriend, and I told him, "Since your dad owns a moving company, you can already take half of her stuff."
My cousin just broke up with her boyfriend, and I told her, "Since your dad owns a moving company, you can already take half of his stuff."
Your mama is so nasty.
She showed up to Red Lobster with her own crabs.
I said to the emo girl, "She gets jealous every time her phone dies."
One day, during lunch, a Spanish kid came up to my other friend and asked her questions in Spanish, and when she was about to say something, I popped out and said, “GO AWAY OR I WILL SUE YOU WITH BRIANNA’S SEVEN/7 LAWYERS!!!!(AKA, her seven/7 shoes.)”
Yo momma so fat, I took a photo of her last year and it's still printing.
How did "Bloody Mary" become a thing?
Because her husband beat her bloody when she didn't stay in the kitchen.
Your mum is so fat, all her relationships are long distance.
"Your mother has been with us for 20 years," said John. "Isn’t it time she got a place of her own?"
"My mother?" replied Helen. "I thought she was your mother."
At a party, a young wife admonished her husband, "That's the fourth time you've gone back for ice cream and cake. Doesn't it embarrass you?"
"Why should it?" answered her spouse. "I keep telling them it's for you."