Height jokes
A guy runs into a bar and yells, “Quick! How tall is a penguin?”
The bartender says, “Three feet tall.”
The guy says, “Oh my God! I just ran over a nun!”
You're so tall you can go see God, but you're so tall your balls got small.
People always told me to open doors for elders. So I opened the plane door 5,000 feet up in the air for a grandma.
If you have a girlfriend/crush that's shorter than you, go up to her and say, "You're short, lemme add some inches."
Milk makes you tall, right?
Well how did you get tall if your dad didn't come back with the milk?
Why does everyone respect midgets and dwarves?
They never look down on anyone.
Why are midgets constantly thirsty?
They can't reach the drinking fountains.
What type of horse can jump higher than a house?
All houses can't jump.
I'm having lunch on the roof of the Twin Towers, and the biggest plane I've ever seen is flying toward...
My friend: "Hey, I see a dwarf!"
Me: "Where?"
Friend: "In front of me."
Why do dwarfs hate fast food restaurants? Cause most of them have medium and large.
What makes sad people jump? A bridge.
What can jump the highest?
Emo kids, some are still in the air.
I asked this kid for a high five, but he could not reach my hand.
The reason why people are short is because their dad never came back with the milk.
How is the weather down there?
I’ll never forget my Grandfather’s last words to me just before he died. “Are you still holding the ladder?”
Why am I still alive?
Pills give me stomachaches, blood makes me faint, height frightens me...
Women be like, "Men's heights," then cry when they get called fat...
"You raise me up to stand on mountains," said the dwarf pornstar on my penis.