Height jokes

Short girl: "How do you see up there?"

Tall guy: "Who said that?"

I spit my drink out and then ran away.

Q: How tall was Hitler's grass? A: *Hitler salute* about this high!

A leaf and an emo fell off a cliff, who landed first? The leaf, because the rope stopped the emo.

What did the janitor think when he was mopping the 101st floor?

The 102nd.

We used to be the tallest buildings in New York...

Then we took an Arab to the knee.

I stood on the edge of a building and someone yelled, "Do a flip!"..... and I did.

Why do midgets run on balls?

Because the grass tickles them.

How many midgets does it take to change a lightbulb?

Three, because it’s the normal person's height.

Gently throw a baby off a ten story building!

Can’t believe how ungrateful my dwarf next-door neighbor is. I saw him waiting at the bus stop earlier today and offered to give him a lift, but he told me to “fuck off.” In the end, I decided to just close my rucksack and walk away.

Do midgets still start their childhood stories off with, "When I was little"?

You're so tall that you are a measuring tape.

My cousin is in a wheelchair and wanted to battle.

So I went up a step and said, "It's over Anakin, I have the high ground!"

Every time a midget runs on the grass, the grass tickles their balls.

I went to a tall girl and I asked her, "What do you do for a living?" She says, "An account." So I reply with, "An accounting the hairs on people's heads," and then I run away.

Why did the midget laugh when he ran? Because the grass tickles his balls.

My friend said not to look down on me. I said I can't because I'm shorter than her.

Like if you're short.

All my 9/11 jokes seem to fly too low.

Teacher: "Ok class, what animal jumps the highest?"

Kid: "A leopard."

Quiet kid: "No, it's emo kids. Some of them are still in the air."

Kid: "Broooooooooooo."