Height jokes

Store owner: You have to be 40 inches tall to go into the adult section.

Kid: Please.

Store owner: Oh okay, but get on your tippy toes.

Kid: Everybody is hugging.

A midget had a disease, and the cure was on the highest shelf.

You’ve really gotta hand it to short people because they usually can’t reach it anyway.

If I grew a nanometer taller for every 2/10 woman expecting a 6’3”+ guy, I would be considered attractive.💀

What do you call a dark, average height Punjabi male?

Josiah.

What do you say to a guy with Down syndrome who’s on top of a sky scraper? "Jump!"

Yo mama so short, she went to see Santa and he told her to get back to work!

Short girl: "How do you see up there?"

Tall guy: "Who said that?"

I spit my drink out and then ran away.

Q: How tall was Hitler's grass? A: *Hitler salute* about this high!

A leaf and an emo fell off a cliff, who landed first? The leaf, because the rope stopped the emo.

What did the janitor think when he was mopping the 101st floor?

The 102nd.

We used to be the tallest buildings in New York...

Then we took an Arab to the knee.

I stood on the edge of a building and someone yelled, "Do a flip!"..... and I did.

Why do midgets run on balls?

Because the grass tickles them.

How many midgets does it take to change a lightbulb?

Three, because it’s the normal person's height.

Gently throw a baby off a ten story building!

Can’t believe how ungrateful my dwarf next-door neighbor is. I saw him waiting at the bus stop earlier today and offered to give him a lift, but he told me to “fuck off.” In the end, I decided to just close my rucksack and walk away.

Do midgets still start their childhood stories off with, "When I was little"?

You're so tall that you are a measuring tape.

My cousin is in a wheelchair and wanted to battle.

So I went up a step and said, "It's over Anakin, I have the high ground!"