Did you hear about the book about gravity? I couldn’t put it down
A kid is learning about planets in school, when he hears the planet Uranus. Knowing it's the perfect opportunity for a joke, the kid replies, "Where's my Anus?"
Did you hear about the Chinese student?
Me neither.
What to hear a pizza joke? Never mind it’s to chesesy
Want to hear an inside joke? I walked into a house.
Want to hear an outside joke? I walked out of that house.
Did you hear the rumors about butter? Nevermind - you shouldn't spread them
You wanna hear a joke?
2 Emo's hanging out under a tree🤣🤣🤣🤣
How many Emo's does it take to commit suicide? Way too fucking many, because they never get it right the first time 🤣🤣🤣🤣
An old lady walks into an ice cream store. Clerk greets her and says, "What will it be today ma'am...we have every flavor you can imagine". Old lady says, "Well, I guess I'd like a quart of chocolate ice cream". The clerk says, "Sorry ma'am, we're out of chocolate today. Any other flavor we'll have". ""Ok" she replies, "Why don't you just give me a pint of chocolate ice cream". The clerk says just a little louder in case she's hard of hearing, "Sorry ma'am, but we're fresh out of chocolate ice cream". The old lady says, "Oh, ok. Why don't you just get me a cone with one scoop of chocolate ice cream?". Finally totally exasperated the clerk says, "Wait a minute lady. Can you spell Van as in vanilla?". "Why of course young man" she says, "V-A-N". "Right" the clerk says, "Can you spell Straw as in strawberry?". "Well of course, Straw", she replied. "Ok then" he says, "Now spell Fuck as in chocolate". She says, "There's no Fuck in chocolate". He says, "That's what I've been trying to tell you... THERE'S NO FUCKING CHOCOLATE!!!".
Why can't you hear a dinosaurs clap? They're dead
literally no one:why cant you hear the pterodactyl random person:i don't know no one:BECAUSE THEY ARE EXTINCT random person:ha cool i guess
A retired george w bush is eating a donut 7/11 and looks at it "im so happy i did that' a guy over hears the conversation and says "your happy you bought that donut. Oh haha I would be too i love donuts!" george w bush then says "oh hahaha you caught me" and then says "you must of heard me wrong i said, im so happy i did 9/11"
wanna hear a skeleton joke? sorry i don't have the guts to tell it
DId you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a sode can? He was lucky it was a soft drink
You are about to hear the funniest joke ever
My life
Want to hear my pencil joke? wait I'm still writing it.
Q: Did you hear about the Twin Towers? A: No, what happened? Q: Apparently, the design was fundamentally floored!
want to hear a dad joke. look in the mirror you get the joke.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Did you hear about the shark that ate a key shop? I think it got lockjaw after that.
did you hear about the song Rihanna wrote about the tin can? It was called "S&n"
