Doctor: I’m sorry, I can’t see you today. Orphan: Oh, how about tomorrow? Doctor: No, I can’t ever see you. Orphan: Why? Doctor: Because I’m a family physician.
Technoblade should have drank milk, would have gotten rid of all his status effects!
what makes a healthy normal man different to a disabled man? " they can move it move . ( from king julian)
A friend called me a while back say "I have COVID.... I can't breathe, I really have a hard time breathing". I reply saying " Dude, you need to work on your George Floyd jokes".
My bother apparently has this thing called "asthma", anyways I took his vape away today and he was lying on the floor gasping for air lol. He must really be addicted to it.
Breaking news man with altiemers forgets he’s blind and recovers form visual impairment
My grandma was telling me to be positive. As i was going in for an aids test
Chiropractor: Final neck adjustment in 3, 2, 1. How did that feel?
Me: *silence*
What do we want A cure for obesity When do we want it After lunch
Im related to diarrhea it runs in my geans
I hate wearing a mask in public
One of my friends named Jill had a drug overdose. She didn’t have any of that drug after that. For the rest of her life she acted very high. When she died, it was because of natural causes, not the drug. So this proves that a lethal dose is also a life time supply.
So I ran into my Specialist Doctor and he said "pick a star sign, any star sign" so I said "Capricorn " and he said "nah you got cancer".
Man Goes To The Doctor He Has A Banana sticking out of one ear , a carrot stinking out of the other ear and a green been stinking out of one nostrils. "Doctor, I'm not feeling well" the man complains. " Well, it's no wonder" The Doctor replies " You're not eating right"
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing diapers!” She replies: “Oh my god! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?” To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
My dad went to go buy milk, but he walks as slow as my grandmother. My grandmother is paralyzed in the legs.
My syndrome may be down but my hopes are up !
Children who are unvaccinated are less likely to have autism. You know why? -You have to be alive to have autism.
Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:
Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.
Q: Why are medication pills white?
A: Because they work
