Happening jokes
A blonde crashes an airplane.
Officer: Could you please explain to me what happened?
Woman: It got so cold in the plane, I turned the fan off.
Officer: *face palms self*
Also officer: Here's your sign.
"Hey, today was great!"
"What happened?"
"I ran into my ex today."
"What's so great about that?"
"I was in my car!"
USA: "Never forget 9/11."
Brits: "What happened on the 9th of November?"
What happens when a strawberry gets run over crossing the street? Traffic jam.
Were you bought on a highway? Because that's where most accidents happen.
What happened when the man died? Yes.
My history teacher asked my class what time they would go back to just to see what happened.
I said I'd go back to Hitler's childhood to tell him the lies that he becomes the ruler of the world by starting the Nazis, and leave his death out of the discussion.
What happens when a frog's car breaks down?
It gets toad away!
Doc: Can I help you?
Girl: Doctor, I have pain in my heart.
Doc: When did it begin?
Girl: Right now (seeing him like a doll).
Doc: Hh...do you like me? I know I am handsome...
Girl: No, don’t get me wrong. You just look like someone I know.
Doc: Who is that? Is your boyfriend?
Girl: No, it’s my pet (rabbit), his name is Rokie.
Me: I am the second worst thing that happened to these orphans.
Friend: What was the first?
Me: They- they weren't always orphans.
Friend: O-O
What happens after you eat at a combination Chinese-German restaurant?
An hour later, you're hungry—for power!
What happened to Stephen Hawking after he reached Heaven? Nothing yet. He is still struggling to get up the stairway to Heaven.
What happens when you bring a paedophile to a baby's birthday party?
You will have even more birthday parties to go to.
My dad died in 9/11, and that was the second worst thing that happened to me with a plane, next to Soul Plane.
What happens when you find a bomb at your local bazaar?
It becomes a flee market.
What happened to the egg after it went on the rollercoaster?
It was scrambled.
In 2006 on 6/9, there was something called communication opportunity happened. On 6/9. 69. Coincidence? I think NOT.
Johnny: Why do cuss words exist?
Mom: That's not something you should think about right now. I'll tell you when you're older.
|| 20 YEARS LATER ||
Johnny: Mom, now can you tell me why cuss words exist?
Mom: Because some people invented them so that they could use them when something annoying happened to them.
Johnny: Damn, Mom, you shoulda told me that when I was still seven 'cause now I really feel like that person.
What happened when the Japanese guy offered Logan Paul a high five?
He left him hanging.
Planes shouldn't have free Wi-Fi. Why? Because the last time they had free Wi-Fi, well here's what happened...
On September eleventh 2001, (children scream).