Grow up

Grow up jokes

Penis

  • One day, a girl was showering with her mom. She pointed at her mom's breasts and asked: "When can I get these?" Her mother replied: "In about 6 to 7 years when you grow up :)".

    The other day, the girl's showering with her dad, and she pointed at his penis and asked: "When can I get this?" Her dad looked around and replied: "In about 20 minutes when your mom leaves the house."

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  • Razor

  • There were two friends talking one day. Tim tells John, "I think I'm gay."

    John says to Tim, "What do you mean?"

    Tim says, "When I grow up, I want to dress like a woman and sing karaoke in a bar and call myself (Gillette the best a man can get)!"

    John says to Tim, "I think you're right, and thanks for reminding me I need to buy razors."

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  • Speed Bump

  • Teacher says, "Okay class, today we're gonna talk about what everyone wants to be when they grow up." Little Johnny, how about you go first."

    Little Jonny: "I want to be a speed bump when I grow up!"

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  • Orphan

  • Teacher: What do you kids want to be when you grow up?

    Kid 1: I want to be a firefighter.

    Kid 2: I want to be a police officer.

    Kid 3: I want to be dead like both my parents.

    Teacher: Ok, everyone pull out your books.

    Kid 4: Are we going to ignore what he said?

    Teacher: What do you want me to do? Call his parents?

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  • Doctor

  • So, I was sitting with my little brother and talking about our dreams. "What do you wanna be when you grow up?" I asked him. He answered, "A doctor!" I wanted to tease him so I said, "I wouldn't be treated by a doctor like you." I was hoping he would get mad or something, but instead, he calmly replied, "Brother, I said doctor. Not a vet."

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  • Kitchen

  • Women should be allowed to leave the kitchen... to clean the rest of the house.

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  • Community talk

  • Ill never let her go, I don't wanna grow up and have to marry someone else. I want the one I'm with to be the girl I marry. I want rose, I want her to be what I wake up to every morning. I love my baby 🌹🫶

  • i js need to like get this out and i cant talk to anyone so ima js say this here but im so done with school its so draining i had a whole ass mental break down and a panic attack in the bathroom tbc of school and the drama and rumors and also bc i missed my mom and bf bc he moved away and my mom is in jail then when i finally calmed down and come out of the stall i didnt know my two bsfs were in there to and i heard … Read more