When I was little, I would pray to Jesus every night for him to get me a new bike. I learned one week in Sunday school that that's not how it works, so instead I just stole one and asked him for forgiveness.
Grandma: Young people your age are married by now, why aren’t you?
Me: Old people your age are dead right now, why aren’t you?
I was gonna do a school shooter joke, but it was aimed at younger audiences.
Little Johnny is watching his mum rubbing cold cream on her face, and he asks her, "Why are you rubbing that stuff on your face, mother?"
His mother replies, "To make myself beautiful, Johnny."
A few minutes later, she starts rubbing the cream off with a tissue. Johnny says to her, "What is the matter? Are you giving up?"
What do you call a group of depressed kids?
Suicide Squad!
What do Drake and math have in common? They’re both hard for kids.
what makes emos jump?
a. bridges
Jack and Jill went up the hill to go and have some fun.
Silly Jill forgot the pill, and now they have a son.
I got in trouble in school for leaving the depressed kid hanging.
Police arrested two kids yesterday. One was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one, and let the other one off.
What's a pedophile's favorite type of shoe?
White Vans.
A few kids were talking about how big their houses were. Kids were pointing to huge houses and huge apartments. One little boy said, "Bet I have the biggest home." To everyone's surprise, he pointed right towards the massive orphanage.
An orphan, an emo, and an apple are on a tree. The apples get picked unlike the orphan, while the emo kid is already dead from hanging.
Is it just me, or do you kids have imaginations?
You can understand depression if you are still in school and get bullied by bullies, punished by teachers, and scolded by parents for being that quiet kid who says nothing.
One depressed kid goes to high-five a tree, but the tree just left him hanging.
What tree is every emo kid trying to find?
The hanging tree.
What game do emo kids love the most?
Hangman.
What is an orphan's favorite game? Sims, so they can make a family to have.
What school does a depressed middle school kid go to?
KMS.
