Gonna jokes
If you're ever bored, just bully an orphan. What are they gonna do? Cry to their mama and father?
I asked my mom if I was adopted. She said no, "Why the fuck would I adopt you?" and I said "I'm gonna kill myself," and she also said, "Make sure you do it right this time."
Alright, I'm gonna drink the lo-carb one to see how it compares to the normal Monster.
Holy shit, it tastes just like the original one.
There's like a weird after taste though.
Kinda like a sparkling water one.
I love Monster. I've drank about 5 cans already.
What did the undershirt say to the T-shirt when they were fighting?
"If you don't shut up right now, you're gonna lose your shirt!!!"
Get it?
Let's see what the orphans are gonna tell their parents about this: "Hey you buttheads, you stink!"
Looks like they didn't tell their parents.
History meme for y’all
What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this one's gonna blow!
Some babies may be delivered via stork, but some bigger babies are gonna need a crane.
The only thing running in THIS family’s your big ass mouth! Oh, I’d better shut up, or Big Bertha’s gonna confuse my head for a burger!
A man has been dating a girl forever. He finally says, "I love you." The girl says, "Aww, thanks." The man looks at her, "Are you not gonna say it back?" The girl says, "No, I can’t."
What do youuuuuuuuuuu Oh f***, my mom is gonna kill me! My shit is stuck on the toilet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gas, gas, gas, I'm gonna step on your ass!
TONIGHT
FOR FUN
YEAH YEAH YEAH
What am I gonna do on the 5th anniversary of the Parkland shooting?
Shoot a load in you just like I shot those kids ;)
I’m gonna put my AR 15 up your fucking ass and pull the trigger!
My birthday's on September 11th, I'm gonna turn the fuck up and throw a banger! Then rub my tits in birthday cake frosting!!! WOOOOOOOOO!
The Eagles when they actually thought they were gonna win the Super Bowl. 😹
Wanna suck my dick?
No? Well then I'm gonna go hang.
I was gonna stop for the cops, but I ran because I was high (the song don't copyright me plz).
From now on, we’re gonna call shitting the bed an “Amber Alert.”
What stands on the side of the road and needs a lot of money to buy?
Billboard, did you think I was gonna say street walker?
Why did the rock not risk going to the other side of the road?
It's a damn rock, mate. It's not gonna walk!