Girl jokes
Can anyone answer this riddle? Apparently this is the world's hardest riddle! Good luck 😝
“I turn polar bears white, and I will make you cry. I make guys have to pee, and girls comb their hair. I make celebrities look stupid, and normal people look like celebrities.”
How do you know if spaghetti is a boy or a girl? It's meatballs.
what came first, The apple or the girl? The apple, because the tree left her hanging :)
Hey girl, are you suicide? 'Cause I think of you everyday.
I hate when my brother dates other people.
Just kidding! 😵😵😵😵
White girl: So this crystal cures my depression and helps me lose weight?
Me holding a rock of meth: YES!!!
How to get a girl in three steps:
Step 1: grab a pillow.
Step 2: grab a blanket.
Step 3: keep dreaming.
What do you call a blowjob from a girl who has autism?
Special head.
Me to my friend: I only date suicidal girls.
My friend: Why?
Me: Because that pussy is limited edition.
What's the best thing about dating a blind chick?
She can't identify you.
A little girl asks her mum, "Mummy how was I born?"
Her mother smiled and replied: "Once upon a time, your daddy and I decided to plant a wonderful little seed. Daddy put it in the earth, and I took care of it every single day."
"The seed slowly grew more and more leaves, and in a few months it turned into a beautiful, healthy plant. So me and Daddy took the plant, dried it, smoked it and got so high that we fucked without a condom!"
What's the difference between a girl and a toy? There is no difference because you play with both anyway.
There is this cute Russian girl in my class, yet she hasn't asked me out for vodka.
What do you say to a ugly girl who claims to have been raped?
“Are you sure you didn’t rape him?”
Girl: Hey.
Orphan: Hi.
Girl: Wanna be friends?
Orphan: Sure.
Girl: Ok, and go ask your parents if we can have a sleep over.
The popular girl told me, "I bet your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory!"
Two weeks later, she shows up pregnant.
...
I guess her rubber broke too.
All school meeting introductions:
Grade School: “Welcome Girls and Boys!”
Middle School: “Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome!”
High School: “Fingerers and fingerees.”
Q. If I go 1 on 1 with Harvey Weinstein, I won't get raped?
A. I'm not a 14-year-old girl.
Why are girls and rocks so alike?
If they're flat, they get skipped.
What turns a girl on more than having sex with her?
When she finds out that you have a vibrator too.