Ghost jokes
What do you call pasta that’s made by a skeleton? A CREEPYpasta! (It’s my first one, lol)
When you think of the word "simp," you think of a girl. "Girl" stands for ghosts in real life. Another word for simp is "ding dong." Put them together, and you get ghosts in real life with ding dongs.
The Queen: "I've had a few medical problems this year. I'm so old that my pussy is haunted!"
Person 1: How smart are you?
Person 2: Really smart.
Person 1: Ok. If you have 3 ghosts and take away 2, how many are left?
Person 2: 1 ghost is left.
Person 1: Wrong! 0 ghosts are left because ghosts don't exist!
What did one ghost say to another ghost?
"You're boo-tiful!"
If your hot dog tastes like a piece of wood, who are you going to call?
"Ghost Musterd."
What goes boo in a car with no lips?
What do you call a broccoli 🥦 when it’s a ghost?
Cauliflower!
Dear Hearing People,
We, deaf people, ain’t dead. We can use our hands to talk, eat & fist your face to give you some 💡 awareness that we can understand you 💯 meanwhile we laugh at you 🤡 We can even dance via vibration through music.
Do you know the song w lyric like this 👇 *white b.... accent: Ohhh.. MY God BECKY.. L👀k at her butt. IT is SO BIG. *BIG BEAT DROP* I...LIKE...BIG...BUTT...I cannot LIE 👻 I promise we ain’t ghosting around - Brittany Rose.
What did the ghost knights say to the cloud king?
"Our souls will rain forever."
What do you find up a ghost's nose? A BOOger.
What do you call a ghost bee?
Boobees.
What do ghosts put on their bagels 🥯?
Scream cheese.
What do you call the ghost of the Thanksgiving turkey? A Poultrygeist.
What do you call a person with cancer?
A ghost with a body.
I complimented my neighbor's skeleton decoration for Halloween, but they just told me that it's their anorexic daughter.
What do you call a ghost's fart?
A spirit bomb.
My son asked me, “What is angel cake made of?”
I reply by listing the ingredients in Mr. Kipling angel cakes. Then he shouts “STOP!” I stop as I reach food colorings. He slowly crawls towards me and says in a whisper, “Well, in my angel cake, I put angels in them.”
I freaked out about this, so I calmed down and asked who did you put in this angel cake. He said, “Grandma, the one who died last Saturday.”
What room does a ghost not want to be in?
The living room.
Did you know ghosts are alcoholics?
They only come out for the boos.