Get jokes
I asked my phone why I couldn't get a date.
It showed a picture of myself.
What do eggs use in war? Eggk47s get my yolk this is really cracking me up!
They’d probably get shellshocked, wasn’t it all eggcellent? Ok, Ok, I’m headed for the egg-it.
Why did the new egg fell so good? It just got laid.
What's the difference between an apple and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
What’s the only reason Emos drink?
To get hungover.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple tray? The apple tray gets picked.
Memes
If every time someone faints when they see your face and I get 1 cent, I would be a trillionaire.
Why did Elsa let go of the balloon?
Car show: "Let It Go," get it?
Why did the elephant cross the road?
To get to the peanut.
Why did the impostor vent... to get to the other side?
The Demon when it gets summoned to earth only to find out it was a spelling mistake in Latin class. 😬
It was my cousin's birthday and my mom said what should we get her? I said a rope.
Stephen Hawking was a spac. But if you put an E on the end, you get space, and he loved that.
Why is an orphan into worshiping Satan?
'Cause they get to call someone "master" and be freaky.
I saw a kid in a wheelchair, and he was getting bullied. I said, "Stand up for yourself!"
What do you call getting assaulted by a gay man? Fruit punch.
Little Johnny likes to play with toy guns.
Little Johnny paints them black.
Little Johnny went to a gun store.
Little Johnny made a big mess.
The cemetery people were getting paid.
Amber Heard Daily Routine:
Get out of bed, drink coffee, take a shit on Johnny Depp's bed.
One day, someone's ex was going to the kitchen to get something to eat, and her ex-boyfriend was there and gave her an apple. Next minute, she had chlamydia. What did the boyfriend do?
Best thing ever right here.
So, there is this app on your phone called ringer. Go into it. There is a 12-15 digit number. Enter that into my phone, my dick will get 12-15 inches longer.
My life is so meaningless that I committed a crime just to get shot. 0-0
This is not a joke; this is just about death...