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Cow

Q: What do you get when the cow jumped over the barbed wire? A: Udder destruction!

Blonde

What do a blonde chick and a field of wheat have in common?

They're both bound to get plowed at some point in time.

Apple

What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish?

A crab apple!

Man

A man and a child walk into a forest.

The kid says, "Um, sir, it's getting dark, and I'm getting kinda scared."

The man says, "Yeah, well, think how I feel. I have to walk back out alone."

Memes

Towel

If you get out of the shower clean, how does your towel get dirty?

Brick

Why is a brick always hard? Because he seen the brick that was getting laid right next to him.

Dad

Dad joke.

Why does a dad get more than a pair of socks at the golf course?

Because of a hole in one!

Bone

My jokes are pretty "bone-arifick," if I say so myself. Hehhehe... Get it?

Turtle

What’s the hardest part about being friends with a turtle?

Getting them to come out of their shell.

Robot

Why does a robot malfunction when they get sad?

Because they have a break down.

Orphan

Why do orphans like going to church?

Because they actually get to say "father" for once.

Chocolate

My chocolate babe is calling my name, and now I'm about to get my chocolate freak on.

Dad

Why do you let your dads sleep so they don't get grumpy and eat your dinner?

Beef

Why don't chickens and sheep get along?

Because they have beef between them.