What's the best thing about Switzerland? The flag is a big plus.
What’s the difference between a cancer patient and a British news reporter in the South?
They usually don’t live to tell the tale.
The reason why Trailer Park Boys is set in Nova Scotia and not Alabama is because if it was set in Alabama, then they would have to record every instance of incest. And the show's writers would need to know how to cram all of it in one season.
Why are people in Japan so thin?
Because it didn't end well the last time a Fat Man was there.
Why does Japan not allow little boys to run?
Because the last time a little boy came, Japan lost a state.
Who is not hungry in Africa?
A dead person.
What do you call a gay person on fire? LGBBQ.
What do you call a disabled person on fire? Hot wheels.
What do you call an Asian person on fire? Vietnam.
What do you call a country's booty?
Its bottom line.
What’s the difference between Texas and Flint, Michigan?
Nothing; no one cares how much lead is in the kids.
The term "every 60 seconds" is so stupid.
You know Africans don’t get seconds.
What do you call a blowjob in Africa?
Breakfast.
My friend fell on the Nile river and Egypt last week.
He swears by it, but he’s in denial.
There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette. They were all trapped on an island, and the nearest shore was 50 miles away.
The redhead swam, trying to make it to the other shore. She swam 15 miles, drowned, and died.
The brunette swam 24 miles, drowned, and died.
The blonde swam 25 miles, got tired, and swam back.
I was sitting in a bar one day and two really large women came in, talking in an interesting accent. So I said, "Cool accent, are you two ladies from Ireland?" One of them snarled at me, "It's Wales, Dumbo!" So I corrected myself, "My apologies, so are you two whales from Ireland?"
America Twin Tower: "Hey, have you seen the Malaysian Twin Tower? I have, but only from 1971 to 2001."
Malaysian Twin Tower: "I STOOD LONGER!"
Q: What's the most popular dish in Africa?
A: The empty one!
What's the difference between Palestine and yo mama?
Yo mama can be found on Google maps.
Your hairline goes so far back you can see a full world scale map in your forehead reflection.
Rapboat so fat he got more chins than Chinatown.
What plate goes to Bikini Bottom?
Malaysia Flight 370.
