Ever wonder why pandas are endangered? Well, China's overcrowded, and therefore they're starving. They have to eat...
Panda: "My god. They're coming! Run! They're hungry! Run! Roll down the hill!"
Chinese People At Bottom Of Mountain With Spears: "Ching chong wing bong KABOB!!!"
The crocodile just kept saying, "No!" He was in Da Nile!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Europe.
Europe who?
No, I'm not.
You are American when you walk to the bathroom. What are you when you are in there?
You're-a-peein'. European.
What's Africa's greatest sporting achievement? The 2018 World Cup...
What's the difference between sand and food? Africans have plenty of sand.
Me: So you two girls are from England?
Girls: Wales.
Me: Oh, I see, so you two whales are from England.
Where does a pianist go on vacation?
The Florida Keys.
A man is meeting a client in Japan, but arrives a day early. When night hit, he went out with a prostitute. They're having sex, but the prostitute kept shouting "Fuji, Fuji, Fuji!", so the man thinks he's doing a good job. The next day, the man meets his client and they go golfing, and the client gets a hole in one. The man praises him by going "Fuji, Fuji, Fuji!". His client turns around confused and says, "What do you mean wrong hole!?"
Here's how to piss off all of North America.
All the United States is, is South Canadia.
Did you hear the one about the hills?
It was hillarious.
I hate when I lose my white friends in the snow and my black friends in the dark. Where do I lose my friends from Afghanistan?
In an explosion.
Beth was from Spain and she had a pig. What did they call her?
Beth-la-ham
Why is the sea salty?
Because the land never waves back.
Why do they put barcodes on the ships in Norway?
Why?
So when they come into port, they can Scan-de-navian.
What's the city with the fastest growing population?
Ireland, cuz it's Dublin everyday!
Teacher: What is the capital of Washington?
Dumb kid: The W???
"You're da bomb!" "No, you're da bomb!"
In America, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.
What did the sand say when it got into a fight with the ocean?
"Oh my God, you're such a beach!"
I’ve never had Indonesian food. Huh...
Neither have they.(:
