Gender jokes
Women be like I don't wear makeup for men.
Then get mad when a man doesn't compliment her in her makeup!
I don't see why women are complaining about the glass ceiling. I mean, if they reach high enough, they can clean it...
What college can Stephen Hawking not go to? Spelman University.
Last night I had sex and she said, "Stop talking about s***, OMG!" and I made her scream so loud she said, "Her balls hurt!"
Hippity hoppity, women are property.
What do you call someone who’s blond, beautiful, and listens to what you’re saying, but only hears what they want?
Womxn
Dad: Are you gay?
Kid: Yes.
10 days later.
Kid: I’m going to my girlfriend's house.
Dad: I thought you were gay?
Kid: What’s wrong with you? He’s the girly girl of our relationship, dumba**.
Dad: Don’t swear and okay, bud.
For all those Simpsons fans out there, this one I'm sure you know:
Abe: "It's rotten being old. No one listens to you."
Lisa: "It's awful being a kid. No one listens to you."
Homer: "I'm a white male, aged 18-49. Everyone listens to me--no matter how dumb my suggestions are."
You know, it takes a lot of balls to successfully compete in women’s sports as a man.
A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"
And the women look at him as if they have never seen a man walk into a bar before.
Why was your mom so into me?
'Cause she was the man.
What kind of food does a lesbian love? Anything they can eat out.
A guy went back to his apartment. Five minutes later, he said to the receptionist, "It doesn't fit!" So she gave him a new key.
I always wonder what girls are thinking about. Maybe balls.
What's the difference between a woman with a penis and a terrorist? You can negotiate with the terrorist.
Why does Megan sound like a man, but she is a good singer and rapper, but then people talk about her? What's y'all rapper are singer?
Q: Why do men say "ladies first?"
A: So they can look at their a**.
You know what a big ass is. If I told you it's a fake ass, so I'm lesbo.
What is the difference between a man and a woman packing boxes?
The man says, "I have everything I need."
The woman says, "I love everything I have."
Me: Knock knock.
Friend: Who's there?
Me: Impatient feminist.
Friend: Impati--
Me: Why don't we have equal pay YETTTTTTT?