Food jokes
Why did the chickens cross the road?
To get to KFC.
What did the orange say to the other orange?
I orange you glad!
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
Why did Brandon harass Sydney because she didn't want to eat his foreskin?
My friend and I joined a french fry eating contest, but I just couldn't ketchup. So we switched to cheeseburgers, but I still couldn't mustard up the speed to lettuce win. I mayo not have thought this through.
So we switched to fruits, but when it got to the watermelons, I started to feel a little green. My friend couldn't seed the point of us continuing anymore. I just couldn't digest the stress, I guess! :D
Me: I wouldn’t want to be with a shitmate.
Shitmate: You’re so shitable.
Me: Bring banana ice cream.
Shitmate: Never happening.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple can trace back its family tree.
What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay person...
It don't moan when u put milk inside.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What happens to grapes when you step on them? They wine.
I bought a horse and named him Mayo.
Sometimes Mayo neighs.
How do cows get their milk? The moo market.
Wanna hear a pizza joke?
Ah, never mind, it's too cheesy.
Women, you're a marshmallow because you're white, squashy, and everyone sticks their stick inside you.
If WW3 starts, I do, in fact, belong in the kitchen.
What do you get when you stuff some cows into a food container?
A can o' bull.
Why did the loo 🚽 roll roll down the stairs? To get to the bottom.
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
How do you put a baby in a blender feet first so you can see its facial expressions?
How do you get the baby out? With a tortilla chip!
What did one plate say to the other plate?
"Dinner's on me."
When is the peanut butter due to arrive?
In a Jif.