Food jokes
What did the customer ask when he went to the cannibal restaurant?
"Who's the special today?"
Which one fell first, the Emo Kid or the apple?
The apple, because the rope caught the kid.
Name a nut. You because are nuts.
You're so fat the only letters of the alphabet you know are K, F, and C.
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome on the beach?
A baked potato.
I have an addiction to cheddar cheese, but it's only mild.
What is long, hard and has cum in it? Cucumber.
What is a 3 letter word that starts with S ends with X and has a vowel? Six.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
The only thing they can see are their chopsticks.
What did the lettuce say to the carrot?
"Lettuce be friends!"
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
When I dunk my cookies in milk, I think of you. I hold them down until the bubbles stop.
You're so fat that when you got to McDonald's, they had to call Wendy's for backup.
I would tell you a joke about meat, but the stakes are too high.
Today I learned that on average, humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
This is partially due to the fact that most humans don’t like the taste of monkey.
Being an orphan isn't all bad. On the bright side, all your snacks are family-sized.
Ur mom loves to eat logs, lmao.
Life's like a box of chocolates. Doesn't last long for fat people.
Q: What's 1+1? 2+2? 4+4? 8+8? Name a vegetable.
A: Carrot 🥕
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple has a family tree.