Food jokes
Making a comforting breakfast.
But you have a knife.
For dinner, this girl had noodles. The next day, she could not find her skinny sister. The mom said, "Your sister is dead!" sadly. The girl asked, "She was skinny, right?" The mom said yes. The sister laughed, "I ate her! That’s why the noodles were very skinny!"
In the cute fantasies: "Est-ce que tu manges du poulet? Attendez une seconde, VOTRE PROFESSEUR VEGAN!!!!!"
In reality: "Are you eating chicken? Wait a second, YOUR THE VEGAN TEACHER!!!"
I'm gonna eat a hell of a lot of popcorn kernels before I die just to make the cremation a little more interesting.
Roses are red, violets are blue, if you take Kirby’s food, he will stab you.
The Twin Towers ordered Little Caesars, but instead got Dominos.
Why doesn't Elon Musk like Taco Bell?
It gives him gas.
What's the hardest part about making vegetable stew?
Trying to get the wheelchair to fit into the pot.
What's the difference between a human and a potato? There is none, you can eat both.
How do you fix a broken pizza? With tomato paste.
Why do orphan kids never eat homemade food? Because they don’t even have one!
I had a very long dream that I was eating the most juiciest, tastiest meal I'd ever eaten in my life. Then when I woke up, my wife was gone.
What cookies did the orphans never try?
Home made cookies!
What do you call an ex eating Taco Bell?
Explosion.
What do you call a dog in China?
E10
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple always gets picked.
Why do orphans dip their cookies in water?
Because their dad never came back with milk. Ohhhhhhhh!
Why did the Twin Towers order from Just Eat?
They wanted some plane fries.
What’s cheese that’s not yours? Nacho cheese!
I like my humans like I like my chicken... Fully cooked.