When ordering food at a new restaurant, my wife asked the waiter what they do to prepare their chicken.
“Nothing special,” he explained. “We just tell them they’re going to die.”
If an Indian had powers, it would be throwing tika masala.
What do strippers and peanut butter have in common?
They both like oil.
Why did the plane go to KFC?
To lose its wings and crash!
One night a guy asked his wife where she wanted to eat. She said, "Chinese food," so he flew her to China. The next night, he asked her what she wanted to eat. She said, "Indian food," so he flew her to India. The last night, he said, "What do you want to eat?" and she said she wanted nothing, so he flew her to Africa.
What do you call a cow without legs? Ground beef.
How do you open a banana? Answer with a mon-key.
What do you call a bald person on fire?
A fried egg.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair that lives in Africa?
Dry Vegetable.
Q) What’s the difference between a baby and a sweet potato?
A) About 400 calories.
Who hates going to a pizza party?
A weirdough.
What Costco food is associated with Michael Joseph Jackson?
The Jackson dog. It's 49-year-old sausage between 6-year-old buns.
The only thing running in THIS family’s your big ass mouth! Oh, I’d better shut up, or Big Bertha’s gonna confuse my head for a burger!
What do you call a donkey and a potato?
Assround
Zis iz za best joke in za west: exsepz if zu put ketup in shawarma itz yo mama!
Hi! Welcome to Papa John's abortion clinic, where yesterday's meat is today's treat. How may I be of service?
Orphans bake bread with what kind of flour?
Self-raising.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their dad left and never came back home with the milk.
Q: How do you know if a gang of Chinese people robbed your house?
A: All the rice is gone.
Why do the orphans eat their cereal with water?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.
