Food

Food Jokes

I saw a black man riding a brand new bike, so I went home to check my garage. It’s all good because I still saw mine still chained to the floor begging for food.

Asked my dad what LGBT stands for.

He started with "Lettuce? Bacon. Tomato. What's the 'g' for?" Obviously, I had to reply with "Garnish."

How do you get a party started in Africa?

You put a slice of bread on the ceiling and everyone will be jumping.

After having a win at bingo, Ethel splashed out on some venison for tea.

During the meal, her daughter asked her mum what it was, to which she replied with a little smile... "It's what I call your father."

Little Jimmy threw down his knife and fork and jumped up sayin', "Oh My God! Don't eat it!!! It's a fucking Dick!"

What's the similarity between Christmas stuffing and my penis?

I like them both inside dead animals, because alive animals feel too much like men, and then I'd cum too quick.

What starts with S and ends with S? STUPID HOMEWORK NEVER ENDS.

What starts with C and ends with K? Children do not cook.

What did you think I was going to say? How bold of you to assume.

Wanted to go to the zoo, it was too packed, so I went to KFC instead. Their monkey enclosure is better anyway.

Yo mama so fat when The Rock hit her with a Rock Bottom, her big fat ass belly let all the pizza explode out of her belly!

In the heart of a circular, creamy delight, there exists a void, a singular absence that adds to its charm. This hollow space, a perfect round, is a testament to the artistry of nature and man's culinary skills.

The hole, a silent observer, bears witness to the transformation of the substance around it, from a liquid state to a firm, yet supple form. It's a silent testament to the passage of time, a symbol of patience and the magic of fermentation.

The void, despite its emptiness, contributes to the overall aesthetic, making the slice a visual treat. It's a playful peek-a-boo with the world beyond, a window that adds mystery and intrigue.

In the end, the hole is not just a void, but a character in the story of this culinary masterpiece, a silent protagonist that adds depth and character to the narrative. It's a testament to the beauty of imperfection, a celebration of the unique and the unconventional.

What's the difference between the milkman and my dad?

Nothing, they are both one thing except he never returns with milk.

(I've been eating cereal with water COMBINATION!)