How do you open a banana? Answer with a mon-key.
Food Jokes
What do you call a bald person on fire?
A fried egg.
Yo mama so dumb, she failed lunch.
Yo mama so stupid that she thought Subway was a place where you buy subways.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair that lives in Africa?
Dry Vegetable.
Q) What’s the difference between a baby and a sweet potato?
A) About 400 calories.
Who hates going to a pizza party?
A weirdough.
What Costco food is associated with Michael Joseph Jackson?
The Jackson dog. It's 49-year-old sausage between 6-year-old buns.
The only thing running in THIS family’s your big ass mouth! Oh, I’d better shut up, or Big Bertha’s gonna confuse my head for a burger!
What do you call a donkey and a potato?
Assround
Zis iz za best joke in za west: exsepz if zu put ketup in shawarma itz yo mama!
Hi! Welcome to Papa John's abortion clinic, where yesterday's meat is today's treat. How may I be of service?
Orphans bake bread with what kind of flour?
Self-raising.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their dad left and never came back home with the milk.
What did the toaster say to the bread?
"I want you inside me!"
Q: How do you know if a gang of Chinese people robbed your house?
A: All the rice is gone.
Why do the orphans eat their cereal with water?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What kind of flower do orphans use to bake bread?
Self-raising...
Q: What is the difference between Americans and Africans? A: Some of them have food, and some of them don't have food.
Someone: PLEASE EAT! I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE!
Me: *Trying to remember how long it would take me to die of starvation because I've already googled it and given up because it takes too long.*
Me: Na, yeah, I still have 19 days left.
