Food jokes
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
Why can't the Chinese play baseball? They ate all the bats.
Why do skeletons like having sex with short girls before eating?
They like to bone a petite.
What’s Elon Musk Jr.'s favorite food?
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What do you call a bruised banana?
A school bus full of his kids.
Bestie Hannah heard that bestie Iz had a migraine! What did she do? She said, "My grains don’t hurt that much, at least not when the animals eat them!"
Hey guys, thank you for finding this. Vote in the thumbs up or thumbs down whether you prefer Reese’s cups or Starbursts, and comment if you have a different preference! I would like to know a little about people! Thanks, Izzy.
Yo momma so slutty, she did a mukbang video with dicks instead of food.
What do you call onions and beans?
Tear gas.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
Me: Hey, I have candy.
Kid: Right next to me, can I have some?
Me: Some of deez nuts.
Q: Why do orphans work at Olive Garden?
A: Because when you're there, you're family.
Me (an adult) with my girl going to a nice restaurant, I asked the waiter, "People under 12 eat free, right?" The waiter confirmed that yes, people under 12 eat free, then my girlfriend said, "But I'm 13."
What's the difference between a black person and an apple?
An apple chooses to hang.
What is an orphan and an apple?
They get picked.
- All over it like a fat kid on a cupcake.
- Giggling like a room full of fat kids.
- Drinking 8 cups of water a day seems impossible, but 8 beers and 3 shots in 3 hours goes down like a fat kid on a seesaw.
Just noticed something: all celebrities die badly except for Elvis. He had a relief after Taco Bell.
What does a pickle look like a p*nis?
Why do Vampires like virgins?
Because eating a sandwich would be so much more appealing knowing no one fucked it.
What do bees like with sushi?
Wasabee.