Food jokes
Orphans are like vegans, no one ever remembers the nice ones.
What does an apple and an orphan have in common?
One gets picked.
At 9/11, the people in the Twin Towers ordered pizza. They asked for pepperoni, but instead got plane.
You look like a cow went through puberty, put the milk before the cereal, then ate it with a fork with a little sprinkle of steak.
Jonny went to Disney and they had sour balls. He asked the cashier for some and he pulled down his pants.
Orphans don't like family sized chips, I wonder why.
How is the world's fattest avocado called?
Niko
What do you call a rooster lollipop?
A cock sucker!
Today I went to get a sub, and they asked me if I wanted all vegetables. I said no, leave some for the rest of the customers.
Why did the emo kid leave the food on the table?
It was the Happy Meal.
Anong tawag sa cake na may ubo?
Edi cough cake! NYHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAKAJAHA LT TLGA BOSIT
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
I went to McDonald's to get a Big Mac. It was for his mom cause she was too fat.
I fucking love rhubarbs.
Yo mama so fat she ate Saturn and mistook it for bubble gum.
I live in China and we have no food. We have to eat Chinese food, so I called my dog over.
What's the difference between Donald Trump and an orange?
The orange tastes good.
Why do cannibals love sex? They can make their own food.
Waiter: "Here you go, one medium-rare steak."
Me: "I like it well done."
Waiter: "Thanks, that means a lot!"
What is Jeffrey Dahmer's favorite restaurant?
Five Guys.