Flight jokes
The pilot that hit the Pentagon must suck at sex because he missed the hole.
If a bird flies, and a duck can also run and fly, while a cat walks, why do we drink water?
What did the soccer player say to the flight attendant? "Please put me in coach!"
You're so skinny, if someone farts in your direction, you will fly away.
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Malaysian Airlines Flight 303!
A pilot is having a talk with one of his passengers. The passenger asks, "Why did you become a pilot?" The pilot replies with, "To face my fears." The passenger then says, "You're afraid of heights?" "No, I'm afraid of dying alone."
What does a kite and a criminal have in common?
They both get high.
You might think these jokes are plane.
How do you call a black pilot?
A pilot, you racist.
"Hello, this is your captain speaking. We are flying at a level of 89 feet. If you look out of your window on the left, you will see the World Trade Center."
People tell Kobe to fly high, but when he flew high, he died.
I would like to remind all passengers that this is a no-smoking flight, although do feel free to join me in the cockpit, where we've opened a window.
I would say fly high to Kobe, but obviously he didn't...
Welcome onboard Sexist Airlines. Everyone, please fasten your seatbelts now as we are switching to a female pilot.
What did the bird say to the other bird?
Nothing, because birds can't talk.
What do you call a bird with no wings?
Answer: A FLAP.
What’s New York’s favorite game?
2001 flight simulator.
People told Kobe to fly high. Look what happened.
What goes zzub-zzub?
A bee flying backwards.
If a chicken flies into the plane and the plane crashes, whose fault is it?
A: The driver's. Chickens can't fly.