Flight jokes
Why did the chicken cross the plane to get to the other skyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy lloooooooooooooooooooool?
According to all known laws of aviation,
there is no way a bee should be able to fly.
Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.
The bee, of course, flies anyway
because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.
Barry! Breakfast is ready!
Coming!
Hang on a second.
Hello?
- Barry? - Adam?
- Can you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up.
Looking sharp.
Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those.
Sorry. I'm excited.
Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son.
A perfect report card, all B's.
Very proud.
Ma! I got a thing going here.
- You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me!
- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye!
Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house!
Every single person on the plane died except for 2. How is that possible?
It said all the single people died; the 2 were a couple. That's how it was possible.
Me: Opens the window to get some fresh air.
Everyone else on the plane: 😟...😱
What did the airplane say to the paper plane? Why do you look like a wimp?
Plane versus plane. Who wins? Plane.
What did one plane say to the other?
"It’s been a long day, I’m ready to crash."
Other plane: "No you’re not, we haven’t even gotten high yet!"
Why didn't the bitch ass skeleton fly?
'Cause me mum flew all the way and Trevor is a boofahead.
So this guy is talking to his buddy about his flying lessons.
"My first time in the air, my instructor informed me that he was an 8th degree black belt and homosexual, and if I don’t succumb to his sexual advances, I would have to jump out of the plane."
And his buddy says, "Well, did you jump?"
The guy says, "Yeah, a little at first."
It was dinner in the plane, and the flight attendant asked the passenger if he would like dinner.
"What are my choices?" the passenger said.
"Yes or no," the flight attendant replied.
So, I was getting on a plane, and the pilot does his usual speech talking about altitude and what not with the microphone, and he forgets to turn it off, so after the speech I heard him and the co-pilot talking about what they were doing after work, and whatnot.
Then the pilot said he was dying for a blowjob and a coffee, so a stewardess ran to the pilots cabin, and then left about 15 minutes later, and the pilot shouted "Next time don't forget the coffee!"
A man says, "I'm flying!" He realizes he was pushed out of a plane.
How do Chinese people name their children?
They drop a tin can down a flight of stairs and call them the sound that's made.
That one person who can never bring a smile to your face...
Until you push them down 3 flights of stairs.
Wanna hear a plane joke? Nah, it'll just go over your head.
Me and my brother were called the twin towers. My brother lived up to his title after the plane crash.
Science flies you to the moon.
Religion flies you into towers.
Who reads the fastest?
The pilot of the plane who hit one of the twin towers. He took out 83 stories in one go.
I guess this is pretty plane.
I am sorry I am just winging it.
Wow, I guess these jokes haven't taken off.
Wow, I just landed that one!
A guy goes onto a rooftop bar and is sitting next to a guy who says he’s drinking a magical drink. He asks, “What’s so magical about it?” The guy drives a car and flies it around the rooftop. The other tries, but falls off and dies.
The bartender shakes his head and says, “Y’know, you’re a real jerk when you’re drunk, Superman.”