Father's jokes
And Mary said God had given her a child, so Joseph went and joined Fathers For Justice.
Why did the orphan go to church?
So that they had someone to call father.
What do orphans and fathers have in common? They both don't have families to go to.
Why do orphans only have 362 days in a year?
Because they don't have Mothers', Fathers', and Family Day!
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?
Because they don’t have a “mother’s” or “father’s” day!
Where can white people cook better than Black people?
On Father’s Day.
The daughter walks up to her father and asks him, "Dad, can I ask you something?"
The father says, "Of course, what's your question?"
The daughter replies and asks, "How do you feel about abortion?"
The father says, "Why don't you ask your sister?"
The daughter replies, "I don't have a sis-"
A Chinese boy never met his parents after they were killed in WW2, so when he learned where they were buried, he quickly rushed there.
He sat down in front of their graves and prayed, "I want to see your face again, mommy..." A miracle happened; his mother rose up from the graves and hugged him.
The boy cried then said, "I want to see you too, dad." He looked at his father's grave, but nothing happened.
Suddenly, a Japanese soldier came up behind him and asked, "Were you looking for me?"
Why are Black women dating white men?
So their kids don’t have to worry about not meeting their father.
What do you call an orphan that grows to be a priest?
Fatherless.
Little Johnny walks into the living room and asks his parents, "Mom, Dad, what do you get when you crossbreed a bulldog and shih tzu?"
The mother and father shrug and say, "We have no idea, Johnny. What do you get?" and little Johnny replies, "You get a bullshit."
My father touched me yesterday. I called him a priest.
What do you call an orphan who became a priest?
Father-less.
Why do orphans go to church?
So they have someone to call father.
A kid asks his father, "How long is our trip, Dad?"
The kid's father says, "Our trip is a Fortnite."
Why does an orphan's calendar only have 362 days? Because they don't celebrate Father's Day, Mother's Day, and Valentine's Day.
I will never forget my mother and father's last words.
"Where the Sam hell did you get a grenade?"
Why do they call priests "father?" Because it's too suspicious to call him "daddy!"
What did the orphan say to his father?
Nothing, he doesn't have one.
How can you tell if your sister is on her period?
Your father's dick tastes funny.