I just had a birthday party last week at my crib. I invited two fine, beautiful looking women. One was skinny and her name was Kelly, and the other one was overweight and her name was Chiquita.
Both of them came by. I told Chiquita only Kelly can stay and enjoy my birthday. You can't, you're too fat and clumsy, and I don't have any food or drinks for you, so see ya later, nutty professor.
Every time I come in the kitchen, my girl is in the kitchen in the damn refrigerator eating all the food, like the fried chicken, the mashed potatoes, the collard greens, mac and cheese, and the cornbread.
Then I said I wanna eat some of that shit. I love soul food. Then I told her, "You keep it up; your fat ass is going to be big like the house on Haunted Hill."
Bully: You are ugly.
Me: You are so fat, you are the Call of Duty map.
You are the reason double doors were invented.
What’s fat, brown, and has no dad?
Ama
What do you call a fat woman that prays?
A holy cow.
Yo mama is so fat that she is not wrong when she says the world revolves around her.
Fat.
Your mom's so heavy that it caused Atlas, the Titan, to slip a disc.
Your mom should show you your real home. The trash!
If death was an option for a look, you could be the first.
What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Your fat ass mom.
Yo mama is so fat, she got locked in a weapon store, and she broke it down without any weapons.
Using pi, distract the fat kid next to you so you can copy his answers.
Yo mama's so fat, a man has to bring climbing equipment to kiss her on the cheek.
Q: What did the DNA say to the other DNA?
A: Do these genes make my butt look fat? 💩
Why is Santa so fat?
He only comes once a year.
Fat people should expect big things when they take their shirt off.
Your mom said I was ugly. I told her she couldn’t see her belly button because she was so fat. She said, “I thought I was the only one without one!”
Yo mama so fat, she broke the stairs to heaven.
What did a fat cow give you?
Homework.
