Fat jokes
You are so fat that Big Chungus looks like a small Chungus.
My friend made this joke (so I’m going steal it). I’m surrounded by fat people, oh wait... it’s just one.
A guy walks into a bar, he's like, "What's your number, lad?" and the woman is like, "298-777-fatso.com" and he walked home depressed.
Doctor: I diagnose you with obesity.
Patient: It runs in the family.
Doctor: Nothing can run in your family.
"Little John, she is fat." How? He said, "Like a pig."
Yo mama so fat, I saw her eat with 3 utensils: A spoon, a knife, and a FORKLIFT.
Yo momma is so fat, when she caught the flesh-eating bacteria, it gave up!
You're so fat that you're as big as UY Scuti!
Why are the jokes fat? Because you made it.
The chicken is so fat.
Your mama so fat, when she put a leg in the car, the wheels deflated.
My girlfriend is so fat, she looked into the mirror and said, "Woah, there are two of me!"
Yo mama's so fat, she woke up on both sides of the bed.
Yo mama so fat when she laid on a water bed, she laid on the whole Pacific Ocean.
Life is like a McDonald's meal; it only lasts 7 seconds for fat people.
What do you call a fat man that has a stomach shaped like an egg?
Humpty Dumpty!
Yo mama so fat, when she put on a yellow raincoat people see her and yell "Hey yo, taxi!"
Your mama so fat, Jupiter is smaller than her.
Your mom is so fat, she can't make it through the door.
Me: If a skinny person goes skinny dipping, then what do fat people do?
My friend: Chunky dunks.