Family jokes
Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar?
They don’t have fathers or Mother’s Day.
A: Why did the orphan not come to school today?
B: Because today we had a parent meetup.
Why is an orphan bad at tennis?
'Cause he couldn't get any love.
What is the only reason you can hit an orphan and get away with it?
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What do my wife and dinner have in common? They are both vegetables.
My mom said if I'm awake playing Roblox still, she said she was going to bang my head against the keyboard. hxhdhduhxbsfj.
Your hairline goes even further back than the last time your parents said "I love you."
If my mom decides to get Chick-fil-A for dinner, and when I decide to eat my family for dinner, is that called cannibalism?
Most people don't realize this, but the F in orphan stands for family.
Did you hear about the orphan that tried to high five a tree? It left her hanging.
So an orphan played for a football team, and the coach said, "Your parents must be proud of you!" 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Beans, your mum is fat!
What is something that makes you wish you were dead, rips your skin off, is small, can wear you out in two seconds, betray you in any way possible, and can eat you alive?
Kid's.
What’s the difference between the milk and drugs?
My dad brought the drugs back, not the milk though! 😭
What's the difference between Vin Diesel and an orphan?
Vin Diesel has family.
I will call my kid Monday, because whenever I see him, I feel disappointment.
Why do orphans want to be criminals? Because they want to feel what it’s like to be wanted.
What's the difference between you and my dad? You come home.
What do you tell twins who are in love with each other?
Go fuck yourself!
Why can the orphan only buy 1 ice cream cone?
He can't afford a family pack.