Family jokes
Why is daonlyjuanhere an orphan?
Because he is the only one.
What do orphans and sperm donor kids have in common? They don't have dads.
What is an orphan's least favorite snack?
"Dots HOMESTYLE Pretzels!"
Why do orphans love blowjobs?
Because they actually get kissed!
I was hitting my hand, and my mom asked me what I was doing. I said I'm beating my meat.
Why are orphans so skinny?
They never learned how to home cook.
SOOOO my sister said her first bad word yesterday. "Shit." My mum was like, "What did you just say, child?"
Sister: "I said the cat shits inside like the dog shi- uh oh......"
Now I've avoided this stuff by making my own word: Sugarplum. Sugarplum = shit...
My sister made some pie, and it tasted horribly... so I said this.... "This pie is very sugarplum-y." She said, "What do you mean by that?" I said, "It tastes like sugarplums..."
You know, the strangest things happen. My mom said, "Step on a crack, you break your mama's back, but if you step on a line, you break your father's spine." I stepped on the line. It didn't break his spine. Mom, who is my father?
This is not a joke, it's a warning!
You guys are stupid. I am an orphan, and you better stop doing these. BTW, if you are an orphan, put it in the comments and say that it's not funny!
What does my dad and the Twin Towers have in common? They used to be with us, now it's just a sensitive topic.
My mom was cooking dinner and asked me if I could get her a cutting board.
"No, I need you to take off your shirt and lay on the island so I can cut some chicken."
I adopted you. Now say goodbye, you missed your Spanish lesson...
Why did orphans play Poppy Playtime?
To get a family.
Q: What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
A: One of them gets picked.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
So he can be hit by a car and be reunited with his parents.
What's an orphan's favorite game to play on Roblox? The game Adopt Me.
I don't understand those couples that fight and a minute later change their Facebook status to single.
I fight with my parents, but you don't see me change my status to "Orphan."
Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to eat Eminem. 🎤😎
Kid: Knock, knock.
Orphan: Who’s there?
Kid: Not your parents.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.