Family jokes
Ryan: Mother, if you had 10 cookies, and I took 4 away from you, how much do you have?
Mother: I will still have ten cookies, because I will not give any to you.
Ryan: What if I forcefully take 4 cookies away from you?
Mother: I will have 10 cookies and a dead body.
Ryan and his mother had cookies that day. Ryan took all 10 cookies. He was never seen again. R.I.P Ryan.
Yesterday I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home.
Evan, mom hot?
Why can’t an orphan play baseball? Because they can’t find home.
What relationship status fits an orphan?
Single.
Why can't orphans make dad jokes? Because they don't have one.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
They don't know what home is.
Why are orphans bad at poker?
They don't know what a full house is.
The orphan wanted to go on a field trip, but he needed his parent's signature.
Children are so ungrateful nowadays. I got my daughter a bike, but now she’s crying on the floor saying, “I don’t have legs!”
Why does an orphan always get the newest iPhone?
Because so he does not have a home button.
Why do orphans play baseball?
So they can touch home.
Little Johnny woke up at midnight on Christmas Eve to Santa with his pants down on top of his mom. He then said, "Ho ho OH YEAH!!!"
The reason your dad never came back with the milk is 'cause he ran 88 mph downhill.
What did the orphan's mom say to him when he got into trouble?
Nothing, because he doesn't know his parents...
A guy gives labor to a baby girl and a boy twins. The doctor said but the lady was like,
"Ugh, why do I need my husband to be in labor and I want a girl, not a boy, just a girl!"
The lady passed out 😵 and then found out she was in a coma. The man who was in labor died. The two babies got a nanny, an evil one. The nanny killed the babies on their first birthday.
My grandpa lost his toe today. 😔
Nvm, we found it. It's in his TOEtruck.
You know that you f**k better than dad?
I know, mom says that too. (Typical Alabama Family)
Your mama's so young your dad went to jail.
Why is LeBron James an orphan?
Because he doesn't use WhatsApp.