Family jokes
Why can't orphans have sex? Because they have no one to call "daddy."
A fireman, a policeman, and a carpenter went on a fishing trip. The fireman and the policeman both have the same father but different mothers, and they are half-brothers. But the fireman and the carpenter have the same mother and father, but they are not brothers. How is this possible?
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Orphan: Throws a boomerang.
Boomerang: Comes back with his father.
Father: Goes to get milk.
I'm 5'6", and my mom is 5'1" and 1/2. She always says she's going to get a suicide vest and fill it with bricks and squish me. I tell her good luck.
And when she tries to hug me, she says, "You're too fucking tall, kid," so I usually reply with "Go get a stool then."
Orphan: Help, I'm lost.
Someone: Wears your parents.
Orphan: >:(
What did the ferret say after his family was questioned by police?
It's none of your business!
Why do orphans say, "Go big or go home?"
So that way they feel important.
A kid called Chris:
:orphan
"When someone asks for a dad joke and you send them to the orphan page."
There was a house with a three-story building.
The first one had Mexicans.
The second one had Africans.
The third one had white people.
An earthquake came.
But who did survive?
The white family because they were at work.
My grandma has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
What is the similarity between an orphan and the new Spider-Man movie, "There's No Way Home"?
If you ever get mad at an orphan, punch them in the face... What are they going to do, tell their parents?
What did the kid say to the orphan?
"Well, at least I have parents!"
Kid 123, how's downline Orphan what? Home! 😂😂😂😂😂 Sorry.
Orphans get family-sized chips for free.
My parents told me that when they had sex, it was absolutely shambles.
Thankfully, it turned out that they were real balls.
Why do orphans try to be arrested? So that they'll be wanted.
Why didn’t the train kill nine families of four?
Because he had no loco-MOTIVE. AHAHAH
Why do orphan kids never eat homemade food? Because they don’t even have one!