My parents were concerned when I said I like to bleed but at least I cut my risk of cancer and stroke in half.
What to you get if you cross diarrhoea with incest?
I don't know.
Neither do I, but it runs in the family.
What does an orphan's father and Nemo have in common.
They are both nowhere to be found.
a favorite childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandfather , that is until my mom took the urn away from me
What do you call children born from incest?
Gross Domestic Product
When you break up with your online girlfriend, and you hear your uncle crying in the other room.
Orphans are funny cuz all they do is sing "we are family"
Boy: Hey mom can we have ice cream. Orphan: What's a mom?
What do you call your angry french aunt
A crossaunt
Why did mommy disapear: the dad: well, when she crossed the road to get to the chicken, she only made it halfway.
I hate this-Everybody knows its how I roll if you jump into my van you get a Tootsie Roll-My Uncle said this.....
my dad told me to do wht he did best so i left
what happens when you accidentally taught your child to call every man daddy?
you find the real one.
What do orphans like about tattoos? They stick around.
Yesterday i saw an orphan walking down the street. I asked him if he was ok. He said no so i asked him if he needed help. And he said yes so i let him in my car and said dont worry you’ll be home with you parents soon. He said my parents died. I said i know.... i went for the cliffs
Me and my brother where called the twin towers, my brother lived up to his title after the plane crash
Daughter: I know this is weird but I feel like that someone is watching me when I am sleeping.
Father: Sorry
Depression I got it. A girlfriend dont got it. A life dont got it. Help got it. Freinds dont got it. Family I got it. Best of all depression I got it !!!!!!!!
A heavily pregnant woman is in an accident and gives birth to twins while comatose. Upon awakening some days later, the doctors tell her that her brother Tom filled out the birth certificates while she was out.
"Oh no, Tom's an idiot, what did he name my daughter?" she asked the nurse.
"Denise."
"That's not a bad name. And what did he name the boy?"
"Tom Junior."
My autistic son hates taking baths or showers.
I don’t blame him, I don’t like soggy vegetables either.
