Family jokes
I went to the dump truck today, and my wife said, "Thanks for visiting."
Little Johnny walked into his parents' room to see them going at it.
He asked his mom what they were doing, and she said, "Uh, we're play fighting," and he's like, "With no clothes on?"
She said, "Yeah," and so he said, "Let me join you then..."
I was watching my daughter play at the park. A woman came up to me and asked which one was mine. I said I was still choosing.
My dad is like a unicorn.
He's never here. :c
If I had a face like yours, I would sue my parents.
Why do orphans work boomerangs?
Because it's the only thing that comes back.
Orphans can get away with anything really bad at school, because they can't be sent home for it.
Evan, this is Mya, and your mom told me you were adopted, so we are done. Bye, don’t talk to me.
You're so ugly, when a pig saw you, it thought that you were their family member.
What’s the difference between cotton and an orphan?
One gets picked.
My Dad pays a lot of attention to our household and has always had a good eye for detail. He was the one that first noticed that my mother and I have the same ring size.
How do you make a mime cry?
You kill his family right in front of his stupid face.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball? Because he can’t find home.
Like this if you laughed.
These orphan jokes would leave them crying to their mommies if they had any.
I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back. (Clearly someone didn't come back with the milk)
Why was the orphan so successful? When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.
What’s the only advantage of being an orphan? Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.
Hope you had fun reading this! My friend and I laughed reading all of em!
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Yo momma so stupid, she wrote this joke!
An innocent boy is reading through his father’s phone, looking at the messages and trying to learn things about his family from them. He saw a message asking for something which seemed strange, but ultimately the boy decided to surprise his father with what it said.
“Timmy, why are there thirty-five cats in the living room?” shouted the father.
“I was only supplying what you wanted from Mother!” replied the boy.
Susie was in her mother's room one night, as her mother was getting ready for bed. She had slipped off her blouse; her boobs, plum and perky. Susie had asked what are those and will I get them? Her mother had said they were boobs and she would grow some in a few years. Her mother told Susie to find her father and say goodnight.
So Susie left, headed down the hall to the bathroom where her father was showering. Susie knocked on the door, he said come in. He had moved the shower curtain over just a bit. Susie said she loved him, and then seen her father's dick. Shocked, Susie asked her father what that was and if she would get one. Her father said it was a dick, and he said Susie would get it after her mother went to bed.
What’s the difference between an ant and an orphan?
The ant knows where home is.
My sister asked me, "Brother, how do babies come into the world?" Then my mom said, "Be quiet and fuck your brother, darling."
Is that the answer?