Family jokes
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple gets picked!
One day, a man visited an orphanage.
Then he sees a kid crying. The man asked, "Where are your parents?"
The kid cries even harder.
Why do orphans air?
It’s invisible just like their parents.
My sister bet me $100 that it was impossible for me to build a working car out of spaghetti.
You should have seen her face as I drove pasta!
Why don't orphans play tag?
Because there's no one to catch.
What do you call Joe from Family Guy in an electric wheelchair?
RoboCop.
What’s the difference between a basketball player and an orphan?
One has a home to run to.
For some reason, my mom likes to lick and suck on hotdogs. As a son, can anyone tell me why?
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
They can’t find home.
Why do orphans like boomerangs?
Because they come back.
If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What does Buzz Lightyear and an orphan's parents have in common?
They go to infinity and beyond.
Why did the orphan run away?
They wanted to go home.
Why are orphans bad at basketball?
Because no one is there for them to pass [the ball].
I dressed up as Darth Vader at an orphanage and said, "I am your father!"
Why do orphans have no sense of humor?
I guess they've never heard a dad joke.
Your children grew up faster than it took you to leave for the milk.
Your forehead is so big that your mom stayed in the delivery room just to give birth to your head.
Your hairline is so far back that even my dad wasn't fetching the milk back then.
What do you call an 18 year old orphan?
Homeless.