Why do orphans commit crimes?
It’s the only time they’re ever wanted.
Family Jokes
Why does an orphan never learn how to drive? Because he has no dad to help him.
What does my dad and the Twin Towers have in common? They used to be with us, now it's just a sensitive topic.
Coworker: Knock knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Coworker: Not your parents.
What is the difference between an apple spread and an orphan spread?
Apples get picked.
What's an orphan's least favorite joke?
Dad jokes.
I say, punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
What is an orphan's least favorite snack?
"Dots HOMESTYLE Pretzels!"
Why do orphans become criminals when they grow up? Because they want to be wanted.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One gets picked, and the other doesn't.
Why do orphans go to church?
So they have someone to call father.
What's the worst thing you can say to a widow?
"I'm sorry, I just had to."
Dad: Ok kids, this selfie will just be me! *screen cracks*
Why can't orphans go to school? They need their parents to sign them up.
Boy: Will you remember me in a minute?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Will you remember me in a day?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Will you remember me in a year?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Knock knock.
Mom: Who's there?
Boy: Bitch, you forgot me.
Why can’t orphans go on field trips?
Because they need a parent signature.
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples get picked.
I don't understand those couples that fight and a minute later change their Facebook status to single.
I fight with my parents, but you don't see me change my status to "Orphan."
What did the orphan say to his dad last?
Please get non-fat milk!
Why is it okay to hit an orphan?
It’s not like they can tell their parents.
