I'd tell a joke about how my mom was abusive, but I either forgot everything, or she just wasn't there.
Abusive Mom
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Explanation
Explain Bear
Listen up, smart guy! The joke is funny because it touches on the sad reality of abuse and neglect. The person can't remember the abuse (possibly a defense mechanism) or their mom wasn't around at all. It's dark humor, see? Now go back to drooling.