Evers jokes

Have you ever heard of horchata? Horchata, fuck up!

Bro, I was told that "LMAO" meant launching missiles at orphanages. Well, I LMAOed. I don't think they are ever gonna see their parents again.

Best thing ever right here.

So, there is this app on your phone called ringer. Go into it. There is a 12-15 digit number. Enter that into my phone, my dick will get 12-15 inches longer.

Does anyone ever get tired of being random? Me neither.

Okay, okay, so one day I was on the way home, and this kid said, "Man, I could kick your butt." Five seconds later, I kicked his butt.

Oh my Prince, I've loved you ever since the day we met.

When I was caught in your net of love, sweet love... It's all above...

Who ever said "condom?" YES DADDY!

I've got something better for all of you. I may not have found it, but Google "hottest sexiest women ever." Then you'll want them!

If you ever get bored, just punch an orphan in the face. What's he going to do? Tell his parents?

If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Did you hear about the man who stole a calendar?

He got 12 months.

Worst joke ever.

Whatever it is, I kind of like it.

If I had a loonie for every degree I have, I wouldn't have a loonie.

Have you ever heard of the eye tear?

Me either.

The last time I ever made a joke was just now.

You know what's REALLY "Ironic"?

Answer:

These REALLY ARE the "Worst Jokes" I've ever heard!

If you're ever in need of a punching bag, just go to your local Alzheimer's unit.

They'll forget you were there in like three minutes.

Ever heard of the currency TNT?

All Arab economies are booming with so much TNT!

TRUE STORY!

X-Ray Tech: I broke my arm and went to the hospital. The X-Ray Tech was the hottest blonde I've ever seen.

I threw her ass down on the X-Ray table, ripped her clothes off, ripped off mine and I jumped on top of her!

Then I put the X-ray machine on top of us, turned it on and I looked up on the X-ray monitor and I watched and saw my sperm swimming up inside her!

So my ex, who wouldn't leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though Will has a better haircut than me, but anyway, when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met, and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat.

Then I told her she has the Wendy's logo haircut and then some other things I'm not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit, I was done.

Anyways, she cried lol.