Evers jokes
Does anyone ever get tired of being random? Me neither.
Oh my Prince, I've loved you ever since the day we met.
When I was caught in your net of love, sweet love... It's all above...
I've got something better for all of you. I may not have found it, but Google "hottest sexiest women ever." Then you'll want them!
If you're ever in need of a punching bag, just go to your local Alzheimer's unit.
They'll forget you were there in like three minutes.
TRUE STORY!
X-Ray Tech: I broke my arm and went to the hospital. The X-Ray Tech was the hottest blonde I've ever seen.
I threw her ass down on the X-Ray table, ripped her clothes off, ripped off mine and I jumped on top of her!
Then I put the X-ray machine on top of us, turned it on and I looked up on the X-ray monitor and I watched and saw my sperm swimming up inside her!
So my ex, who wouldn't leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though Will has a better haircut than me, but anyway, when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met, and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat.
Then I told her she has the Wendy's logo haircut and then some other things I'm not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit, I was done.
Anyways, she cried lol.
Have you ever been eight before?
You were between 7 and 9.
Cancer is the best thing ever! Hahah, fuck all you cancer patients!
Ching chong kading dong.
(My best words ever used).
Your life is the best joke ever.
My kids [are] so damn bad[.] We took them to Disney in Florida. They paid me not to bring them back ever.
What's the grossest thing ever?
A bag of dead babies.
What's even more gross?
The bottom one is still wriggling!
The patient says, "Doctor, you've got to help me. Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say."
The doctor says, "Next, please."
You, I didn’t see you there. The pizza place is hunted bad, so you are scared 😱😱😱😱 and so you run and you see your grandma, and you were happy again forever and ever ha ha so funny 😁. The end or is it bye-bye?
Guess what? If your mom ever wants to have sex with you, tell her to make another.
Why do women have legs? Because they would leave snail tracks wherever they went.
Robin Williams' death was the most horrible impression ever given. (RIP Robin Williams, you will be missed!)
Why don’t rappers ever get lost?
They always have a NAVIGATOR dropping the beat.
What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing, it just waved. This was the worst joke ever.
If you're ever bored, hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?