If you put your foot in a pond, your foot will get wet.
No joke, I just wasted about 5 or 6 seconds of your life.
To spite Santa and Greta Thunberg, I'm burning the coal I got for Christmas.
Vegans: Save the Earth.
Normal People: We're trying to, but you guys keep eating it!
A few male neighbors came over to the house to take a shower because, for some reason, their house didn't have water.
A few minutes later, I walk into the shower. I see the male neighbors and Mom taking a shower together. Then I said, "What are you doing?" They all say, "We're taking a shower together so we could save water."
What's the worst living thing on planet earth?
Humans.
What runs but does not walk? It's water.
I speak for the trees.
*Trees whisper in my ear*
They said six million wasn't enough.
Q) What do trees call deforestation?
A) TREASON!
I always look at the earth and think, "Ahh, this is TREE-ific!"
I saw a petition on replacing gravestones with trees so it will be a beautiful forest.
Son: Where's grandma?
Three men were in a desert. One man was holding a jug, the 2nd was holding a paper bag, and the last was holding a car door. A man came around and asked the 1st why he had a jug. He said it was his water and if he got thirsty, he would take a drink.
Then he asked the second why do you have a paper bag? The guy said this is my packed lunch, so if I get hungry, I will eat my lunch.
Then he asked the last man why he has a car door and he said if he got hot he would roll down the window.
Two people were on a boat. They were afloat on water!
"I was lost in the woods yesterday."
"I was in some sticky situation..."
I air.
There was an oil spill in the ocean. Now the ocean can't see!
Yo mama so fat that when she sits down, global warming starts.
Why does the environmentalist pimp have his hoes fuck bareback?
He wants to keep condoms out of landfills.
If we can't see air, can fish see water?
If we can't see air, can fish see water?
What’s worse than Sally in one trash can?
Sally in 13 trash cans.
