What do Michael Jackson and Tesco carrier bags have in common? They’re both made out of plastic and harmful to children.
How do you recycle a condom? Turn it inside out and shake the f *ck out of it!
I don't have a carbon footprint; I just drive everywhere.
What do you call California when it’s having a wildfire? Completely normal.
What is brown and sticky?
The leftovers of the iceberg.
Don’t kill the Earth, it’s the only one with beer.
So when Kim Kardashian went into the ocean, the lifeguard said, "No plastic littering!"
What do turtles and lesbians have in common?
They both choke on plastic.
What is wet going up and wet going down but doesn't move?
A mountain!
hehehehehehehehehehe
What do turtles and lesbians have in common? They both choke on plastic.
What do sea turtles and lesbians have in common?
They both choke on plastic.
What is the difference between climate change and the greenhouse effect, once a philosopher, twice a sodomite?
Keep the planet clean. It's not Uranus.
What is green and blue?
Grass and the sky.
Look - it's the lake of whiz!!!
In 2013, it was reported that China has lost around 28,000 rivers; over half of what they thought existed. Some say climate change is the cause, others say it’s their harsh, economic expansion that’s unapologetic to the environment.
My theory is that those 28,000 rivers were sold to underground river-sex trafficking.
How do you clean the ocean?
With tide!
A Texan and an Alaskan walk in a room. The Alaskan says, "My state is bigger than yours." The Texan says, "It won't be when it melts!"
Why is mercury like everything else in the world?
Because it gives you cancer.
What is the difference between a human and a tree and yyyyy night I can drive yyy earth 🌏?
