Entertainment jokes
I’d make a joke to Fetty Wap on this, but there’s only a 50/50 chance he’ll SEE this.
What do you get when you mix alcohol with literature?
Tequila Mockingbird.
I heard Steven Spielberg is coming out with a new movie about fat people called E.C.
(Extra Cholesterol)
Only a true MHA fan would understand.
Look for the Gummy Bear album in stores on November 13th, with lots of music, videos, and extras!
What is Michael Jackson's favorite button?
Light mode.
What's Michael Jackson's favorite hobby?
Nothing because he's dead.
What do you call a homosexual wrestler?
Gay Mysterio.
A man goes to the doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world.
Doctor says: "Treatment is simple. The great clown - Pagliacci - is in town. Go see him. That should pick you up."
Man bursts into tears, says "But doctor... I am Pagliacci."
I went to visit my friend who is a stand up comedian and I asked him, "Why do you have so much art supplies, clothing fabrics, and building supplies in your basement?"
He responded with, "I don't know what it is people think I need it all for, but almost every time I perform, people tell me I need new material!"
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome trying to beat Minecraft?
“A sped runner.”
Dark humor and women are very similar...
Not everyone appreciates them, but they both give everyone something to make fun of.
What is a porn star's favourite potato crisp flavour...
Prawn cocktail.
My girlfriend left a note on the TV saying, "This isn't working!" I don't know what she's talking about, the TV works perfectly fine.
What is an orphan's favorite naval film?
"Spider-Man: No Way Home."
Why is Harry Potter an orphan's favorite character?
Because Harry Potter has no parents, so it’s relatable.
What’s an orphan’s favorite movie?
Spider-Man: Homecoming.
What is an orphan’s least favorite movie?
"Spider-Man," because it told them there was no way home.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Pornhub is down, your mum's Facebook will do.
What game can an emo play on their wrists without an ink pen?
Tic-tac-toe.